Stress and frustration hang over me like some distant rain cloud, which threatens at each moment to spill it’s wet drops. The more I fight against it, the closer it comes, until I just give in and allow myself to be enveloped in it’s inky darkness. My body is showing the effects of the battle, with skin that is freckled with an acne outbreak, and a bloat that resembles an overfilled balloon.
It is hard to move past the obvious signs to what lies festering just beneath the surface. The aches and pains of multiple illnesses claw and gouge their way in, making me rail against them one moment, and give in the next. This continual see sawing fight is wearing on me, allowing for raw nerves to edge ever closer to surface. It doesn’t take much for emotions to come tumbling out, one over the other as my family watches in a shocked disbelief.
Relief comes in small waves of medication and sleep. It becomes a crazy cycle that I can’t break free of.
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