Ghosts and the long and winding road

As usual, when it is time to go to bed, my head runs in different directions, and I find myself often not wanting or, at other times, not able to fall asleep. On this particular night, I found myself thinking of past ghosts that seemed to rise from nowhere and fill the inky blackness of my bedroom. Awash in the memories and unable to sleep, I found my way to the computer.

With a click of a mouse, the computer hummed to life under my finger tips, and I found myself stroking the keys in a mad rush. I found a friend, an old soul from years gone by, willing to listen and provide much needed wisdom. It was during this discourse that I came face to face with the ghosts of the parents I wish I had versus the material being.

In recounting life events that could have been, I pondered where the steps toward the pothole filled road could have been averted, and a more even and stable road taken instead. What impact could have been made by open lines of communication between parent and child? Is this conflict between ghosts and shadows of what could have been a legacy that must be fulfilled?

Thoughtful and thought provoking answers were provided. My friend’s wisdom and honesty helped some old ghosts find a resting place. Other ghosts, although not vanishing completely, were calmed. I found myself looking at truths that I had not expected to find. Perhaps all of this answer seeking madness is really a juxtaposition of the parenting I received and my own parenting skills. One truth is that most children grow up and away from their parents, regardless of how they were parented.

The road begins the same – away from the parental nest. What appearance the road takes next can be altered to some extent by the type of parenting the child received while still in that nest. Indifferent parenting can almost guarantee a difficult path. Choosing to be an active and involved parent may seem to lead to a harder road in the short term, but the adult road is more even and easily travelled. This produces fewer ghosts to deal with on sleepless nights.